The most upset I’ve ever been
During our four day and three night family vacation in Savannah, we dined out for lunch and dinner every day. This is a huge and rare treat for us. Most of the time, we eat out once a week and it’s to Chick-fil-a.
Our last night on vacation, we wanted to enjoy some seafood. Fresh seafood straight from the ocean. We found a place, read a couple reviews and headed out. Nothing too fancy or uppity. A little place on the riverfront.
As a bonus, we hit traffic and our girls, who never nap in the car, slept on the way there.
We arrived a little before 6:30pm, they woke up, we walked in and we were immediately seated at a table outside on the patio (our choice). There were quite a few other tables seated and enjoying themselves. Right next to us was a large table with a couple families and their children.
We then waited. And waited and waited. Not one person acknowledged that we were sitting in their section or even a courtesy “I’ll be right with you.” (Sidebar: I’ve waited tables at many different restaurants from family to fine dining establishments…I know what to expect.) Instead, we were completely ignored.
After at least five minutes, a girl runs past and says she’ll be right with us. Great. A couple seconds later, another girl walks by, sees my pleading eyes and says “Has anybody helped you?” We quickly answered “no.” She got our drink order and our meal order. Besides the wait, things were going fine.
The girls are sitting very well at the table with us. We were chatting while waiting for our food. My salad arrived before the meal, so I started to give the girls some. #2 kept signing “more” and saying it at the same time and #1 was eating all of my cheese!
At this time, I noticed some commotion behind us where a table was being moved and chairs were being rearranged and then some people were seated at it. I immediately heard them ask to move “when another table gets up.” I thought it was so they could be closer to the waterfront. I wasn’t eavesdropping, either. They were being quite loud and clear.
Right around the time our food arrives, #2 yelled out once. Mr. Serious was about to get her and walk around off the patio (outside), but then she stopped. She did it again, and off he scooped her up.
Again, behind me I hear the table ask to move “as soon as another table gets up.”
I thought that was kind of odd, I was pretty sure it was clear the first time, right?
Then, I hear, “oh, it was a red head” following by laughing. Hmmm…pretty sure we’ve got the only red heads in the place.
Then, the kicker.
I couldn’t believe it. They were right.behind.me.
“People should just wait until their kids are old enough to take them out to a restaurant and they can behave themselves.” Then, they kept mumbling and grumbling like we couldn’t hear.
What? Excuse me?
I sat there. I didn’t know what do to. Mr. Serious had #2 walking by the water and #1 was with me at the table. I couldn’t do anything.
At this point I was quite upset. Almost furious. I was shaking.
I sat and tried to act normal for #1. How dare somebody judge me and my kids for being kids and making noise while sitting on a patio. How.dare.they.
Mr. Serious walked up with #2 (finally) and I went to him. I briefly told him what happened, and then I walked over to their table.
Yes, I confronted them.
They needed to know what they said was heard. I think it was completely out of line and not at all appropriate for them to not only say something where I could hear them, but more importantly, where my kids could hear them.
I calmly and quietly said to them “I can tolerate my kids being noisy. However, I cannot tolerate you talking about me and my children while we are sitting right here and they can hear you. I don’t appreciate it and I think it was very rude. You have now ruined our dinner.”
These grown adults (two women and a man) mumbled something that might have been an apology and then started pointing fingers at each other. Seriously. They were blaming each other!
I then scooped up #2 and walked down to the water where I told her what a wonderful girl she is and how much I love her. A couple minutes later, Mr. Serious brought #1 down to the water too. I then told her how special she is and how much I love her.
The three of us girls waited by the water while Mr. Serious packed up our most expensive meal of the trip into styrofoam boxes. He paid the bill and gathered all of our belongings and joined us.
After sitting by the water in some swings and chatting with some very nice young ladies we headed home.
And, we ate our seafood dinner, out of styrofoam boxes with plastic forks and knives, while sitting on our hotel floor.
But, I had my family with me. And, in those moments, all was right with the world.
Alright, putting on my big girl panties now, I think I can take what you have to say….tell me this; Would you have let it slide? Or would you have said something to them, too? Or, was I wrong in the first place for even getting upset with these people? I am usually a very non-confrontational person.
You have got to be kidding me! So happy you said something, what immature jerks!
I applaud you for standing up for yourself and your family. Having two young girls myself (and loving to eat out) I've been in your shoes. However, I've never been able to stand up to the rudeness.
In my mind you did the right thing by praising Isabelle for being so good. And I'm so sorry that a few people could ruin a night out for you. It's amazing how rude people can be.
Like you said, you got to eat dinner with your family. That's most important. Good on you for standing up!!
You are awesome! I probably would have let it slide, but I'm so impressed that you said something.
Sweetie, as someone with NO children of my own, let me tell you this…first and formost, you are a wife. Second, you are a mommy.
Defend your babies no matter what.
You did a beautiful thing.
Which is why you have a beautiful family.
You should have thrown a drink at them…
I think it's fricken fantastic that you confronted them! I would have done the same thing to defend my family!
Good for you!! I probably wouldn't have been quite as nice as you either!!
Good for your Krystyn! I'm glad you said something. Maybe they will think twice next time and not ruin anyone else's dinner with their rude comments. Anyways, I'm glad you had a nice dinner in the end with your family!
I APPLAUD you for standing up and saying something! I would have done the same thing and then stayed and enjoyed my dinner with my family. But I do see why you left. Good job Mama!!!
Oh. My. Gosh. I would probably have turned around and not been able to hold my tongue as long as you did. Good for you standing up for your family.
If I would have been really pissed, and it sounds like you were, I would have gone up to them and said something too.
My going out to eat with my family is super important to me though; I love those times and for someone to make me feel like I'm being inconsiderate as a parent in bring my children would just kill me.
Good for you, I say.
It sounds to me like you did the right thing. Without lowering yourself to their rudeness, you still conveyed to them how inappropriately they behaved. Because oh.my.yes – that is seriously rude. Why couldn't they just ENJOY that there were cute kids, like most (sane) people would've?
I don't know whether I would've left or not, but it sounds like you were uncomfortable enough that it was the best thing to do.
Wow. You are a braver woman than I. I probably would've been really immature and encouraged my kids to be even LOUDER. 😀
Bravo- really. It's not like your kids were hanging off the rafters and you deserve a good meal as much as they did- they were not nice. I am from the Carolina's and as much as I love aspects of it I know that some folks just have an uppity-ness about them that they should leave at home- I also used to wait tables- as long as the kids don't turn the table upside down it's all good :)- You are good and I got mad with you as I read it- – – You go Girl!!!!
Girl! That was awesome. People are SO rude. AND.. I so know exactly how you were feeling. People say the worst things to me all the time. BUT, it KILLS me when they say it in front of my kids. KILLS ME! I've gotten much thicker skinned since having quads and have started talking back. I prob would have done something very similar.
So sorry you dinner was ruined. However, it sounds like to go was prob a MILLION times more enjoyable.
AND, I love the way you talk to the girls afterwords to. Just beautiful.
xoxo
Gen
I think you did the right thing. You didn't say, but I can assume these people were young and childless? If not, they should be shot. If so, wouldn't you love to be a fly on their wall the first time their kids go out?
Seriously, I applaud you for saying something. I'm non-confrontational too and probably wouldn't have said anything, but not from the lack of wanting to!!! You're my hero. Super Krystyn.
You totally did the right thing. People like that need to be put into their places. They were probably the older generation and they didn't go out to eat with their young. Good Job!!
These people are going to have a very hard time if they don't ever want to be seated next to a family, especially since most families act worse than how you said yours was. Your girls, in fact, sounded downright pleasant. It's never easy to go out to dinner with kids, it is a lot of work and it can be noisy and messy, but sometimes it has to be done. We can't keep them, or ourselves, sheltered until they're older. That's just impossible, and ridiculous. You did what you had to do.
I would have never said anything because I'm a big baby. I think it was awesome of you to stand up for your family.
Quite honestly, I think it depends on the situation. I wasn't there and even though you might have thought your girls weren't being loud, maybe they were.
DESPITE THAT, Krystyn, I agree with you 100%, your girls being loud does not give them the right of any kind to be so ugly towards you and your family. If your girls were even being loud, it doesn't sound like it was enough to disrupt anyone's meal and/or conversation.
I think that you had every right to say what you said and I probably would have been just as tempted to stand up and say something too. If those people wanted to make snarky comments (like a bunch of 5 yr olds better yet), they should have expected you to say something, or at least be able to back up what they were saying.
I'm so sorry that you guys experienced that. It was frustrating to read, but I'm so glad that you learned a very valuable family lesson in the end.
Honestly, I don't know what I would have done. I am not afraid of being confrontational, but I also don't always choose to be. Depends on my mood and reading the others in a situation and deciding what is worth what in the moment. I was wondering if you were going to go up to them and politely say, "I just wanted to let you know that I put in a request to move to the next available table because of the incredibly rude people sitting at the table next to us who are basically harrassing my family with their loud and rude comments." Followed by: "“People should just wait until they are mature enough to handle themselves properly in front of children before going out to eat in a restaurant .”
being rude and stupid and mean should hurt. those peeps would be in a lot of pain. sorry that happened….really. hugs
I absolutely would NOT have let it slide. You did exactly what I would have done! What nerve. Some people are truly inconsiderate and RUDE. Children are a part of this world too! You are an amazing family and I think that you couldn't have handled it better. In the end it just brings you closer as a family. Youll never forget that night you ate expensive seafood out of styrofoam containers…and eventually you will only remember the good part about why you did it… each other.
I've been there, I feel your pain, I wish I could give you a hug or a high five or a standing ovation. The rude remarks you hear as a mother are sometimes so hurtful and mean . . . thank goodness you have enough love in your heart to show your girls your love for them and not let these ridiculous adults ruin a perfectly nice time for your family. I don't know if I have the hutzpah to do what you did, but I would have your back any day! 🙂
I haven't read the other comments but all I can say is GOOD FOR YOU! Nothing like adults acting like spoiled children to ruin your meal. I only hope I have the same gumption if the situation ever arises for us (which no doubt it will – there are plenty of rude people in the world). If nothing else – you taught your daughters to stand up for themselves and be strong!
Ew! Good for you for telling them you won't stand for it. Maybe next time they have something to say, they'll remember what you said, and keep their mouths shut!!
I would NOT have let it slide. Good for you for standing up to them! People should know it is not OK to be rude. I'm proud of you!! & when I was reading the story, my chest got tight with anger on your behalf!
Girl you did the right thing. I hate ppl who think children should be seen and not heard. Who the hell are they to judge? And to do it so loud you are able to hear, thats real immature and way worse than anything your children were doing. I would have def. said something and have had that similar experience in the airplane with K going to FL. You have to stand up for your children and your family, if you don't who will?
You were totally right to say something to them! They were obviously rude, inconsiderate and ignorant to the fact that children have ears too and could hear the things that were being said.
You were way nicer than I would have been actually, and I commend the courteous way you addressed the situation. That redhead comment would have set me off & it's not like you were in the restaurant late at night or something (even if you were it's no excuse to be loud and judgmental). Some people!
I do not have your kahoneys! Way to go…I need to remember to say something to my kids when something like that happens, I would not have thought of that!
Sorry people suck sometimes
I don't know if I could have done it, but I'm glad you did.
You did the right thing. It's not like you guys weren't handling your children…for pete's sake, your husband took one out to walk. But for grown men and women to make comments such as that in front of the children…geez. Good for you.
I definitely would have said something. I probably…No, no. I knwo for sure I wouldn't have been as polite as you were. I can not stand all these anti-children people out there. They were at one time a child. What is the big deal? Unless an establishment has a sign that says no children allowed, I'll take mine in. They are always on there best behavior which is expected but children make noise. People can deal with it. Ugh, I can not believe they did that to you. Rude nonsense. I'm glad you said something and I'm sorry these "people" ruined the evening for you. Some people are barbaric, what can I say?
I don't think I would have said anything but that's because I have little to no backbone but I wholeheartedly agree with and applaud you.
Especially considering it sounds like the girls were being pretty well behaved, all things considered. What, people with kids don't need to eat, too?
definitely way to go for saying something! i am not so sure i would but i think lew would have said something. i hate confrontation!
glad you told them how you felt though!
good for you!!! How rude for people to act like that!! So people shouldnt take kids anywhere – because kids ARE unpredictable & sometimes they just let out how they are feeling. Nothing wrong with that. Kids, even at their loudest, dont bother us… I even have to laugh sometimes at them…
hope these people felt about an inch tall when you were finished talking to them!
I would have done the same. I'm non-confrontational until children (mine or others') are attacked.
I'm sorry. Some people are jerks. If they were parents themselves, they likely didn't have the confidence you or I have to take their kids out with them and teach them how to behave. How else will children learn?
I don't know that I would have gotten that upset but I do think it was inappropriate of them. It's good you let them know how their comments made you feel.
That being said, I understand not wanting to sit by kinds in a nice restaurant. M and I moved for that same reason a while ago. We were on a date and a 5 year old was seated by us. She was lovely and not loud but we were on a date and trying to get away from kids. We moved but told them it was nothing personal; we were on a date away from our son and trying to avoid children. They understood.
I feel those people could have handled it with much more class but it's good you were still able to enjoy your night!
I am definitely the type to tell them what I thought. Sometimes my mouth may get me into trouble but these jerks deserve it. If they don't want to be around the public with children, then maybe they should have went to a bar or a strip club where they could have spent their time with adults only. Good job. Not so sure I would have ate on the floor of your hotel room (Eww) but hey sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.
Oh girl, you had every right to say what you did.
Some people are so rude.
You paid just as much as they did for their meals…they are no different than you.
I'm actually glad you said something.
On the other hand, I would have actually stayed longer and ate there! But I understand why you left!
You go girl!
Sorry they ruined your dinner though!
I'm proud of you! That was COMPLETELY out of line and I don't know if I would have had the balls to say something, but I think you handled yourself very respectfully & they got exactly what they deserved & needed to hear. Little do they know that someday our sweet red heads are going to rule the world!
Sorry you had to experience that!
Oh Krystyn, I am so, so sorry that you had to go through that! Especially here, I hope it didn't taint your view of Savannah! We deal with rudeness all the time. People say to me and have since the Boys were babies, things like I'd kill myself if I were you or I feel so sorry for you or wow, that must be awful. REALLY? I feel sorry for them that they think kids aren't an amazing blessing! I do say something because they can understand what people are saying and like you I don't EVER, EVER want them to think they are anything but completely loved, amazing, wonderful boys! Good for you for standing up to them! I love that they were so concerned with your kids possibly disrupting them, that they never considered how much they were disrupting you and your family. I hope they learned a valuable lesson. (((HUGE HUGS)))
Wow! Some people have some nerve! I, like you, am not very confrontational. I'd rather try to avoid it, but in recent years – before my boys – I've learned there are times I have to speak up. I'm glad you were able to do it, and do it alone, and proud of your girls! Unfortunately some people just don't get it! Sorry it wasn't how your planned, but I can totally see you guys eating on the floor while w/ your girls and it being perfect. 🙂
first of all i am so sorry this happened. i don't understand people some time. and second i think it's crazy what you will do all in the name of your kids. once you become a mom i feel like your whole world changes – and things like standing up for your self and your girls – something that's "not" like you – becomes amazingly easy.
so very proud of you and so very proud of how you handled the situation. especially the part where you walked the girls down to the water and talked to them. you my friend are an amazing mama.
Good for you for standing up for your children! Some people are so rude and truly do not understand the impact they have on others. They completely ruined your dinner, and an expensive one at that. It was a treat for you guys, too bad they didn't get them a table else where right away, you guys deserved a fantastic dinner, not to be ruined by them. Do you think they have kids?
Good for you to stand up for your family, I can not stand the rudeness of others. I would have said something also. There are times I have let things slide while out (with my daughter and with my young cousins). Some people just can not be nice!! Good for you to enjoy your evening with the ones that matter and let them know.
wow…I can't BELIEVE that people would do that. I mean, for real, who do THEY think they are?!
Good for you to stand up for you and your girls….I don't think I would have been that brave…but you never know! 😉
Standing ovation from me!! I am right there with you.
There is very little that gets me going but add my kids to the mix and all bets are off. People need to understand that that type of behavior is unexceptable. Good for you!
SOOO glad you said something. I have been more aware lately of those kind of things. Recently a couple and their child of maybe 3 were sitting across from us. They were dropping F bombs and everything else. I finally told them that we don't talk to our children like that and that we didn't appreciate them talking so loud that our children could hear it. People are immature and just because they are out does not mean that we need to be subjected to their immaturity! Way to go for you!
Can I just say I am so proud of you!
Those people needed to be told what they did was completely out of line. There are a few restaurants that are Adults only and that is the only place you can go and not expect to see and hear children. One should never be upset because a child is being a child. Good grief. How rude.
You did the right thing, and more then that, you very probably saved some other poor Mom the same miserable experience.
Good for you for standing up for yourself and your family. People can be so rude it's ridiculous!
Ok don't shoot me. I'm of two minds here
I have been in resteraunts and peoples children were running wild and screaming and when it's the couple that is on the back side of the booth and I know they are not policing their own children. Well I would ask to be moved. But tht wasn't your case!
I like you always ask to sit on the patio as it offers a more relaxing atmosphere an my children can be a little looser
I would have confronted them also. I would have explained no matter how old you get some people should never be allowed in public. Especially loud inconsiderate jackasses! Then I would have told the reateraunt about my horrible service and the rudeness of it's patrons and insisted on somekind of discount on my dinner to help me get over my trauma!!!
Hook for you or stickin up for your family!!!! Well done!!!
Good for you!!! If I had been there with my son they would have died!!! He can fits like no other.
So proud of you for standing up!
I'm so glad you spoke up, you had every right to put them in their place. I cannot believe they were so openly rude. I could feel my heart beating faster just reading this.
I AM sorry though that you left and didn't get to finish your nice dinner out. Hugs girl…
Not only would I have said something but I wouldn't have been as nice as you were!
I think this is a symptom of the culture we live in these days. With everything from instant messaging to email, we have forgotten how to communicate, and we have forgotten how to filter ourselves. We vocalize every thought that courses through our brains, without taking a moment to determine whether they are worth saying. It's killing civility.
I'm proud of you for taking a stand, and requiring adults to act like adults.
I hope you're feeling better today — your children are just children, behaving as children do. Oh and they're beautiful too.
Good job. 🙂
good for you! This post has actually made me cry because it brings back such horrible memories from taking my family out to eat and having someone be incredibly rude to my kids, esp my son Will, who is 3 and autistic. It reduced me to tears in the parking lot.
I'm so glad you sad something.
I probably would have resorted to subtle food throwing. You went with the much more mature approach 😉 Hugs, Jen
I agree with you! I would have said something too – you are out on a patio, what do they expect?!?! Glad you stood up for your family!
OMG, I felt my blood pressure rising as I was reading this. I am SO angry for you! And I totally would have confronted them too and not been nearly as nice as you were. When will people realize that children are allowed out in public too! It is one thing if children are running like crazy through a restaurant and acting inappropriately (*cough* my neices *cough*) but when children are sitting with their family and just being CHILDREN and people get upset over it that just totally pisses me off. Ok, whew, feels good to get that all out…
Oh, and the fact that you were outside and sitting near other families…that obnoxious couple obviously made a poor decision if they wanted an adult only place!
I would have done the same thing. People are so rude at times. Now granted, if my kids were being brats, too noisy, whatever (anything is possible w/ my kids) then I "might" have apologised to them, but ti does not seem like your girls were being out of line at all, AND, even if they were, the other table did not have to be so rude about it. I think you did the right thing.
Don't mess with a mama and her cubs. Some people are so dense. I'll never understand it. Are we to stay in our houses until our kids are teenagers?
Girl…THAT IS MY BIGGEST PROBLEM WITH SAVANNAH! How manny times have I said it is NOT KID FRIENDLY and you got a full dose my Friend! That CRAP happens all the time here! Recently at Olive Garden here..SOME OLDER people saw that they were going to be seated next to me and my boys…who were sitting quietly coloring but they panicked and asked to be MOVED! Well let me tell you that moved all right and they ended up sitting next to a screaming toddler and I enjoyed every single moment of it all!
I can not begin to tell you how many times people here in Savannah make comments about other tables and the kids at it. I have even watched this go on without my own children. IT drives me crazy!
OK email me and tell me where you ate at….I am dying to know now.
You handled it great and I am so sorry that happened here. That is the NUMBER one complaint by my Mommy Friends about living here. It is so UN Kid Friendly. It also is one of the reasons I live where I live here. Much more kid friendly down this way.
HUGS to you my friend and next Time you come to Savannah…we will have to meet up!
Ughhhh that is awful!!
I mean, I could understand if your girls were throwing toys, climbing over the booths, being loud and obnoxious, etc. then maybe they could be irritated. But, I would be just so relieved to be around sweet, quiet, well-behaved kids…I don't get it!
I am so sorry 🙁
Good for you!
I'm too busy being ticked off at that other table to say more.
You rock.
I would have said something. But I'm a confrontational person. That's totally uncalled for. If you don't want to be around loud children, don't go to a family restaurant on a patio during spring/summer months. Stay home. Ugh!
Good for you! I would have been so mad but I don't know if I woudl have had the guts to confront them…I hate conflict.
I think it's wonderful that you stood up for yourself and your family. That was incredibly rude of them and it sounds like the restaurant itself was a little oddly run. I'm glad you spoke up and hope you did enjoy your dinner even though it ended up a little different than planned.
Seriously sitting in my office wanting to applaud you!!!! I totally would have said something. This mama bear gets super mad when something like that happens. You did the right thing!!
So proud of you, and so sorry it had to happen in the first place.
What a wonderful parent you are to your kids. If you would have sat there quietly the kids would have thought you agreed with the awful people! Way to go!!!
It's my first time reading your blog and boy this story got to me. From what you relayed, they had made predetermined judgements when they sat down, hence the comments about getting another table. They had decided that sitting near kids was going to be a problem ahead of time. Who says all kids yell and scream at dinner? Some sit very nicely, eat their meal, color, whatever. And, if there was a problem, it seemed like you and your husband were totally into handling right away and not letting your kid sit there and scream. Kudos to you all the way around. For having great kids, knowing how to handle them, for loving them and in the end, eating dinner together as a family. The only thing I would have done differently? Eaten my takeout on the beach off the restaurant!!!!
I am SO pleased that you stood up for your little girl, Mama Bear 🙂
Isn't it empowering?
I really don't know how I would have reacted. Pre-kids, ALWAYS confronted. Now, I'm just so tired I pick my battles more 🙂
I think it’s so great that you stood up for yourself and your family. That was incredibly rude of them! “People should just wait until their kids are old enough to take them out to a restaurant and they can behave themselves.” Be Real People! Yes I would have said something to them to! I had something like this happen to me, and We had even went outside to set so we would be away from the other people. A couple came out and set right beside us and started mouthing saying things they had no right to say, and I did get up and tell them what I thought, I said Excuse me, I was here first! there are tables inside and tables out here farther away from us, if your not happy setting there get up and Move! because im not going to. They didn’t say they were sorry and they didn’t move, but neither did we, our evening was ruined.. that happened years ago and I still get mad when I think about it… Rude People!
Yeah, we were outside, too, and it was wide open inside.
Why do people ruin it for others? And, what gets me is kid haters. Don’t people realize they were once kids?
At the risk of sounding like the devil’s advocate, I have been that person who asks to move away from little kids in a restaurant — even before I see if they’re acting up or not. I’ve been a mom for almost 18 years, have four kids, and my youngest (age 5) has Asperger’s. It’s super-rare that we take all the kids out to eat; even more rare to a non-fast-food establishment. But when we do, I request to be seated away from the crowd, to minimize any negative impact they might inadvertently cause other patrons. I’ve had many date nights and girls nights out ruined by other people’s kids. It doesn’t sound like yours were misbehaving at all, but yeah…if I was nearby in an adults -only group, I’d have asked to be moved, too, in the hope that Id have a better chance of a peaceful evening. I’m usually very discrete about it, though. And that redhead comment was totally out of line! Anyway, I think if it were me, I wouldn’t have confronted them. But like I said, I can sympathize with both points of view.
I don’t feel like you are being devil’s advocate at all. In fact, I don’t think there was anything wrong with them asking to move. I think that they should have not sat there if they were already knowing that their meal was going to be disturbed, you know? We were sitting outside on a patio in plastic chairs. There was an entire restaurant. I guess when they asked and were told that was it for sitting outside, they should have asked to wait for another table? Does that make sense? Instead they just sat there and then repeatedly asked people to move. Oh, and they got there after us and had their meal before we did, so the restaurant definitely wasn’t helping.
And, I totally agree with asking to sit away from people, too. When we got there, we were by the large party with several families and kids so I figured that would be fair game.
And, yeah, you didn’t know that red hair changes your behavior? Ugh. Seriously, people. Just as much as my freckles change mine!
Sounds like the adults were the ones who didn’t know how to behave in this case. You were right to confront them, but I wish you had stayed. Your girls are a pleasure to be around and my guess is they would have realized that by the time the night was over. If not, at least you called them out for being rude.
I think you were in the right especially considering you were outside. People get so darn sensitive about the dumbest things. Kids are going to make noise and should. We don’t live in the age of “children should be seen and not heard.”
Interestingly, I read a similar story on Facebook earlier this week by a mom who had gone with her husband and kids out to dinner at a seafood restaurant here in NC. Their children had some meltdowns which they handled as cooly as possible and decided, on their own, to pack up and leave. They also finished their meal on the hotel room floor from to go boxes. The difference? When they went to pay at the restaurant, the waiter informed them another patron paid their $100 bill and commended them on how they handled their children. They never figured out who it was. The table immediately next to them actually said they had considered doing the same (paying the bill) and also told them they were doing a good job.
Just goes to show any situation can be made good or bad. It’s a shame the 3 people at the table close to you decided to be the problem themselves by taking the low road.
I think you handled it in a calm and appropriate way. Personally, I think more people need to be called out on their thoughtless actions so that maybe one day they’ll think a little more. By handling it calmly, you made them think instead of get defensive.
As far as being redhead? I don’t get it. I’m so jealous of red hair!!
I hate that restaurants (and fellow customers) can be so neglectful and rude. We’re taking our son on his first flight next week and I’m terrified how other people will react. Not my kid, but the adults.
I’m glad you confronted this learning opportunity for them, and I think it’s tragic that you left. As a divorced mother of three, in a highly visible public relations role within my own company, I’ve addressed this issue several times now, so my routine has become just that, a well-rehearsed response to the galactically obtuse. And, since their childish lack of grooming had left them incapable of presenting a valid argument in person, with integrity and decorum intact, in family dining venues like the one mentioned here, I meet them on their own turf, with the following, equally audible commentary, “(Child’s name), there are some inappropriate people at the next table making comments about why Mommy takes you out to eat at such a young age, so I just wanted to explain to you that the reason Mommy does this is so you can learn, from an early age, how to behave and act in a restaurant, because those people obviously weren’t taught these things, or else they’d know better and have better things to talk about over dinner than to attempt to make younger guests feel bad for having parents who love them enough to train them properly.” To date, I’ve never had a single offender revisit the issue. However, I have often had other diners approach our table commending the defense of my children.
“How dare they” is right. I can’t count how many times when wrangling a wayward toddler in a grocery store or mall when I’ve fielded insolent remarks like, “maybe next time she’ll hire a sitter,” and quipped back in a grocery or mall, “Yes, some adults these days still need babysitting because they never learned to keep their mouths shut in public.”
And I defend these tactics only because we aren’t speaking of unruly children in a fine dining restaurant. We’re speaking of normal, run-of-the mill FAMILY activities, and the fact that there are grown people who have so forgotten their own childhoods that they now take full poetic license in their obnoxious attempts toward coercing others’ parenting to meet their own lack of grooming should not be accommodated, lest we produce an entirely new generation of similarly inappropriate adults to replace them.
Instead, keep fighting the good fight, standing your ground, and remembering instead, the dozens of people I’m sure you’ve already experienced complimenting your children’s behavior in restaurants, and thereby, your parenting. Nothing speaks more profoundly that you’re doing the right thing, after all.