Open Letters from Halloween

Dear Weather-
Pouring down rain on us during trick or treating is so not cool. Could you please get it together for next year? Thanks.
A mom who doesn’t want two soaking wet babies
Dear 40+ year old lady,
It is completely unacceptable for you to knock on our door, hold out your bag and say “trick or treat!” And, if you are going to go through that trouble…at least have a costume and a baby or a kid as a prop.
The lady who doesn’t give out free candy to “grown a$$ women” (in Mr. Serious’ words)
Dear 17+ year old kids-
A beanie does not make you a gangster. Make a little effort with your costume, please. And, don’t use your backpack for treat or treating. Backpacks are for homework and textbooks and stuff, alright?
Mrs. Serious, your friendly high school science teacher
Dear Kids Who Think It’s Okay to Knock Repeatedly on My Door When the Light is Off,
You are lucky I was calm when I answered the door. And, yes, I might be a little crazy. But hey, didn’t your mom tell you not to knock on a door with the lights off? It’s rude. And, I’ll tell you again next year if you come back.
The lady who had to teach you something your mom should have taught you (see below).
P.S. Thanks for not coming back and egging or TPing our house.
Dear Parents of Above Kids,
It is not okay to drive your kids around and let them knock on doors with lights off. Yes, I saw you sitting in front of the house in your car driving along side of them. That’s not cool, parent. Not cool.
The lady who was doing your job and schooling your kids
Dear Neighbor,
The Mask a la Scream with the fake dripping blood down the front is NOT acceptable to wear when a three year old knocks on your door. Nor is it acceptable when a one year old knocked on your door two years ago. And, your wife saying “look at the silly man” does not make it cute, either. That is NOT funny, and we won’t be coming back to your house. Please get back on your rocker and learn what is appropriate and what isn’t. Please stop scaring my daughters. I don’t think it’s funny. Not. One. Bit!
Your neighbor who things you are rude and crazy


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  1. ROTF! That is freakin' hilarious. Did y'all actually withhold candy from the grown a55 woman? We had one come by there and I gave her to tootsie roll while giving out handfuls to the kids standing next to her. Seriously, when did Halloween become a free for all for everyone?!

  2. I have spit my coffee out laughing at you…YOU got me so tickled that I can not stop laughing! OOO the adventures you guys have!!!!

    OMG! WE were lucky we had a no scary and no monsters Halloween. Our neighbors really go out of the way to make it NON scary around here.

  3. Cute post. 🙂 I can't believe a grown woman showed up at your house. LOL

  4. Awesome! Print these out and hand them out around your school. Some kids… some parents, geesh!

  5. Oh girl..those are hilarious!!
    I think there should be a age limit…jr high and thats it!
    I was so surpised at the amount of older high school kids walking around with pillow cases! Ridiculous! Atleast dress up!
    Scary guy should be ashamed of himself!!

  6. That was hilarious! I have to say I agree with it all! Crazy mask guy reminds me of Ava being traumatized by a guy with a fake hatchet in his head at one house. She kept talking about it off and on for two days. I just don't get why grown people like to be that sickening.

  7. Oh and I meant agreeing with it all by your reactions, not all the craziness.:)

  8. Sounds like you all had a very interesting night…! Seriously though, doesn't any follow the Halloween etiquette anymore??

  9. OMG, you made my afternoon with this post. I'm laughing like a crazy.

  10. This is too funny. My nephew wore this mask and my son made him take it off over and over so he could make sure it was still him. I can't believe an older woman was trick or treating.

  11. Love them! So true. Why do people find it so hilarious to scare toddlers?! Makes me so mad!

  12. Hehehe!
    "Grown a$$ women" Hehehe

  13. What is with those knocking in the dark kids? The light is off, off, off.

  14. Rain, that does not sound like fun at all. We had cold weather but I will take that over the rain. And yes what the heck was that 40 year old lady thinking. Wow thats nuts!

  15. Alrightythen. Sounds like *somebody* had an eventful holiday. And, if nothing else, at least we all got a laugh out of your trick-or-treating woes. 🙂

  16. Do ALL of the Halloween freaks live in your neighborhood? That is pretty bad for just one night!

  17. Yikes! You guys had a rough go of it. We only got one group come by when our lights were off. We always get just one person. Weird. Other than that, it was okay other than K getting sick.

  18. I don't know what's funnier. The letter to your neighbor or the one to parents. Hope you guys had a great night!

  19. Oh God, too funny! I can't imagine being the old lady trick or treating hahaha!!

  20. Seriously? A 40+ woman trick or treated at your house?!?! WTF. Not cool. I would have told her off.

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