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Two things that will get you far in life

THIS POST MAY CONTAIN AFFILIATE LINKS. I MAY EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

I’ve known for a while that this new generation, this “entitlement generation,” I like to call them, has some issues. 

I think most of these issues stem from the fact that their parents want to be their friends instead of their parents. From this, I’ve concluded that there are two very important things that really aren’t being taught in all homes that should be.  And, if they are taught, they are quickly forgotten.

Respect for yourself, and for others.

Responsibility for all of your actions.

When you have these two things, I really think everything else can and will work out.  

Children are so quick to snap at adults or even their peers and make judgments.   They will ask you “why” when they they should say “yes ma’am” or “yes sir.”  They will call you a “liar” to your face.  They will accuse you of being “unfair” or “racist” at the drop of a hat.  They will swear at you or in front of you.  They will flat out tell you “no” when you ask them to do something.  They think that they have to be given respect first before they can give it, instead of respecting the title a person holds.

They have so little respect for themselves that they let their friends talk poorly to them.  They dress inappropriately and crave attention, even if it is negative.  They think a D grade is “good enough.”  They strive for mediocrity.

They are so quick to blame somebody else for anything and everything.  “I didn’t do it.”  “It’s not my fault I….”  “Look, they are all doing it, too.”  They say that people fail them and the government will take care of them and their babies.

If they could just respect themselves and take responsibility for their actions, it would open up so many opportunities that a lot of our youth are missing out on.

What are the things you hope you instill the most in your kids?

Are you scared?  I am.

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THIS POST MAY CONTAIN AFFILIATE LINKS. I MAY EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

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30 Comments

  1. Oh My Gosh. I have these thoughts on a daily basis! As a teacher (right now a substitute teacher…) I have seen the cream of the crop as far as these types of kids go. It is amazing the things they are okay saying and doing these days! Respect is a lost cause… I completely agree that parents aren't teaching it enough.

  2. I worry constantly of how Maggie will grow up and that she will respect others and herself. Where did all the entitlement come from? How do you change a whole generation?

  3. I definitely kids these days think they are entitled to things. I don't know about you but if I wanted to go shopping at Abercrombie…I had to earn it.

    Respect is definitely what I want Will to get from us but also want him to think for himself and not go with the crowd.

    Taking it one day at a time..

  4. THIS IS THE BEST POST EVER! You have no idea! YES I AM SCARED! You are so right!

  5. I am not scared at all. I have hope that our children will grow up to be loving and caring adults who make the world a better place. I think being positive and filled with hope is so much better than thinking the worst is going to occur!

    Love your two rules to live by. Wise!

  6. I was a high school teacher (and my husband still is) and yes, the lack of these are a problem in lots of kids. There are lots of great kids too (most of those kids do have a good family life and someone to teach these things to them).

    What scares me is that HALF of my husband's pay may soon be based on the gains of some of these children (you know the ones that prefer to sleep through class and have a 10% average because nobody is making them do HOMEwork). Honestly, you cannot MAKE a child want to learn, no matter how hard you try. Teachers are not scared of accountability but to base it on kids that just DO NOT CARE is scary!

  7. Oh, yes, I am scared! Terrified! It shocks me to my core the attitudes and lack of civic and personal ethic I see in the majority of my students every day. And yeah, I want to shake the parent for making these high-schoolers this way. Except that someone needs to hold the high-schoolers accountable. But man! It is an uphill battle! It's no wonder we're constantly exhausted and downtrodden. What I wouldn't give for one day where all my students were respectful. At least to my face!

  8. So, so, so true! This is something my husband and I complain about a lot. And our culture is not helping it at all. Why worry about your grades or work hard when you can just audition for American Idol and get FAMOUS – everyone is doing it, right?

    Definitely scary stuff.

  9. This post was perfect for what happened this past week w/ my 13 y/o niece. Unbelievably rude and disrespectful to her parents and teachers. 🙁 I may print this and show it to her, so she [hopefully] gets a clue at what adults see about her generation and ways of thinking / acting. She disrespected her dad and puffed up on him and left the house b/c she didn't want to walk the dog as she was told and is RESPONSIBLE for! Then gets detention b/c she wanted to sit w/ her friends instead of in her assigned seat and didn't answer her mom's phonecalls on purpose b/c she "was upset and didn't want to talk". [Shaking my head] It's awful! Had it been me I would've gotten a rude awakening before even ATTEMPTING to leave the house being rude. And what's so strange to me is that it's my sister who is the mom here, and she grew up just as I did, but that whole "friends instead of parents" thing is happening and their "little girl" is slipping away. Sorry for the rant!!

  10. Ain't this the truth, sister! You are so right and I agree with you 100%. I get especially frustrated when I hear or can see the entire "government will take care of me and give me what I want" attitudes. It's sickening. Sickening to me that we are supporting people with that attitude, or at least that we will be someday.

    I don't mind helping those who need it, but I sure as heck don't want to take care of those that EXPECT me to because, as you said, they don't know how to show anyone including themselves respect.

    And, I think I heard my freshman year of college that my generation (I'm 21) was being referred to as the helicopter generation, one where parents tend to want to do everything for us instead of letting us do it on our own. I'm so thankful that I had parents who cared enough to let me learn some things on my own and I hope to pass that on to my children as well, along with SO much else, of course.

  11. My main goal with my little girl, is to raise her to be a responsible/self reliant adult! AND… yes, I'm a wee bit scared for sure!

  12. I am so with you. And it's amazing how naturally it seems to come…I'm already struggling with Jack about his sense of entitlement!

  13. Wonderful points. I do think respect and responsibility are important for kids to learn. I also think it's important in this day and age of "now" to teach patience.

  14. it's so true. They feel like they are entitled too things and they deserve everything.

    You forgot about how they can't live without a cell phone and they think you have a phone to make life easier for THEM! 🙂

  15. You're a teacher, right? So you probably see it more than I do. I agree, respect and responsibility are two great qualities and something everyone should learn.

  16. AMEN! I am so tired of this as well. My other favorite thing I hear if I correct or ask someone to do something, change a behavior, etc is "You're not my parent/mom/dad." Today it was "stop parenting me." And all I though was, well somebody better do it. I hate having to parent my students. It is so exhausting and a waste of time most of the time, not because they might not learn from what I say, but because I have other things to do. 🙂 One of the most important things I want my kids to learn is that they are loved; by their parents and God and his son. I think the confidence and reassurance that can bring is immeasurable. The other would be that while that love is unconditional, they should still try to deserve it. 🙂 (Mainly, treat others how you want to be treated and not the other way around!)

  17. You are spot on. Going to tweet this post now. So important for parents to be on board and realize this stuff….

  18. OH my gosh, I am so with you on so many levels. And the worst part is that I am terrified. Because I could raise the best children in the world, that are brave and respectful and caring. But the consequences could be scary. Will they be the ones to jump in front of the bullet that the kid whose parents just didn't care shot at another kid? Will he be the only one and in turn be like the mouse in a cage full of cats? Things are SO scary these days

  19. It's interesting that you perceive this as a generational thing. Your argument was precisely the one my parents gave me 13 years ago when I told them I was moving to the US. "Americans, Sadia, are so self-entitled. They have no respect for themselves or others."

    We've tried to instill respect, responsibility and discipline in ourselves and our kids. My husband does so because his parents did, and he thought it was a good thing. I do so because my parents didn't, and I thought it was a bad thing.

  20. Oh my gosh! How true. When I was reading this post I was like "does she know my kids"? My 16 yr old is getting ready to be shipped of to boarding school because he has zero responsibility for anything, my 9 yr old is ALWAYS telling me I am wrong, I am lying to him etc etc. It is scary, I am trying to nip it in the bud with my younger kids now.

  21. I didn't even have to read your whole post to know exactly what you were talking about. With teaching first graders, I am totally elbow-deep in the "entitlement generation" and lack of R-E-S-P-E-C-T and responsibility! Some days lately it even makes me wonder why I chose to be a teacher, which is very sad, because I chose it for many good reasons and really loved it with a passion a few short years ago!

    But it really does show me how I plan to raise my kids and what I want to instill in them as they grow into adulthood.

  22. can i just say amen!!

    you are preachin to the choir sister!

  23. I'm scared too, but I also find myself working that much harder to make sure my kids aren't like that and I think it is starting to show when we are out in public. (Now I've guaranteed myself a tantrum on the next shopping trip.)

  24. Oh my gosh, amen amen amen. It is so sad to see kids and teens these days growing up with such a disgusting sense of entitlement…and zero respect for anything or anyone. I was certainly not raised that way, and while I wanted for nothing {my parents were admittedly well off and very generous to us kids}, I had to earn everything I was given. Good grades? Rewarded. Volunteered all of the time? Rewarded. Worked hard in swimming? Not only did I get a scholarship to college, but the 'rents bought me a car. But man, I knew that the second I started taking it for granted, or just assumed I should have it "just 'cause", it was gone in an instant.

    I hope that I can raise my kids to know what accountability, responsibility, respect, and hard work are…society sure doesn't seem to think they are important anymore!

  25. Krystn..thanks for the comment and the heads up to enable my email. Only thing is, how do I do that? Is it on the blogger page?

  26. It is amazing how little girls can wrap daddy around their fingers at such a young age! My daughter does it to. Love the pic

  27. You've hit the nail on the head when you say that it's a matter of parents wanting to be friends. That's exactly what it is.
    You can be loving and supporting without being a door mat.
    If you don't say "No" to them when they're three years old, they certainly aren't going to listen to "No" as a sixteen year old…..
    🙂 Great post.

  28. very, very scary. that's why I'm locking my girls in our house until they're at least 21 😉

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