Tips for writing thank you notes


My mom raised me to write thank you cards. I don’t remember a time I didn’t write them. Everybody likes to be thanked and it typically doesn’t even take a long time. Plus, getting personal mail these days is almost a gift for the thank you card recipient too!

tips for writing thank you notes

I’ve partnered with Basic Invite to bring you some tips together for writing thank you notes so you don’t forget anything.

Tips for writing thank you notes.

1. At the party or shower.

At baby showers I’ve attended recently, the host or hostess already has thank you cards printed that match the baby shower invitations. When the guests arrive, they address their thank you envelope to make it even easier on the expectant mom. I think this is a great touch. The invitations and thank you cards match for extra special coordination and the expectant parents don’t have to find new and updated addresses. (Tip, grab those addresses off the thank you cards before mailing them so you have them for the birth announcements you will send out in the future).

writing thank you cards

2. Involve the kids early.

Our oldest two are now at the age where they write their own thank you notes. And, they are really good at it! The younger two still get most of the help from us, but they still know what we are doing and why we are doing it. And as time goes on, they will go from just scribbling on their cards, to writing their names, to filling in the blanks to writing the whole note.

3. Order cute and / or coordinated cards with the invitations.

It helps that the thank you cards are really cute, too. And, I don’t just mean with the kids. When I have a cute card on which to write, it makes me happy to write it out! Plus, if you’ve already ordered them with the party invitations, you have them all ready to send out as soon as the party is over (okay, well, not right away, take a little time to pat yourself on the back for having a successful party, and then get to writing them.)

tips for writing thank you cards

4. Write it down.

When a gift or act is done, write it down to remind yourself to write and send a thank you card. Put is with the thank you notes, in your planner, or somewhere that you will see it so you actually remember to send them out! If it’s at a party, make sure there is somebody responsible for recording gifts.

tips for writing thank you cards

5. In the thank you note.

I try to follow a little formula for thank you notes.

  • address them by name
  • thank them for the gift / action, specifically by name
  • tell them why you liked what the thank you know is being sent for
  • add one more thank you in
  • sign with a closing and your name

I know that probably seems obvious, but it’s a great starting place. It’s also nice because I’ve received notes that say “thank you for the gift” and that’s it. I don’t gift for a thank you note, but if one is sent, I want to make sure they received the right thing (My sister ordered a milk frother one time. She received a silver turkey. I would would never know if they received a silver turkey and were meant to receive a milk frother without it mentioned in the card.)

writing thank you cards

I think sometimes people forget how nice it is to receive a written note. Not only does it show appreciation, but it lets a gift giver know that the gift was received. Plus, I think writing the notes not only shows the appreciation, but it also helps you (me) to remember who sent the gift. I can remember almost all gifts we have received (even wedding presents). Mr. Serious, on the other hand doesn’t remember nearly as many because his slow writing got him off the hook for many of the notes that were sent out.

It is so easy to find custom thank you cards these days, too. With places like Basic Invite, you can order highly customized baby shower invitations, birth announcements, first birthday invitations and more.

Almost Unlimited Colors – Basic Invite is one of the few websites that allows customers almost unlimited color options with instant previews online. Once you select a design you can change the color of each element on the card to over 160 different color options so you can make sure the card is exactly how you want it down to the littlest detail.

writing thank you cards

Custom Samples – Basic Invite is one of the few websites that allows customers the ability to order a printed sample of their actual invitation so they can see exactly how it will print as well as the paper quality before they ever have to place an order for 500 invitations.

Over 40 Different Colors of Envelopes – Basic Invite is just as colorful with their envelopes as we are with their invitations. Customers can choose from over 40 different colors when it comes to their envelopes so that they can make their invitation stand out even before it is opened. All of their envelopes are peel and seal so the envelopes can be quickly and securely closed without having to lick a single one.

Is it just me? Do I expect too much? Do you still write thank you notes? Do I owe you a thank you note?


Similar Posts


  1. Pre-kids, I was really good about sending Thank You cards for everything under the sun. Post-kids, I am lucky if I remember to send out the invitations that would actually warrant the Thank You card! So I guess I have to say that I have become a little more relaxed on the Thank You card thing even though I wish I wasn't!!

  2. I'm a thank you person too. I just think it's common courtesy and I have always written thank you notes for every one of my kids' birthday parties as well.

    It seems to be a lost art these days but certainly one that needs to be revived.

  3. Ahem…

    Dear Krystyn,
    Thank you so much for the lube you sent that I won via your blog giveaway. We're..ahem…really enjoying it.


  4. I'm with you. I write them. Almost to the point of extremes. But seriously. It really doesn't take that long. And it's a nice gesture!

  5. I'm good about thank you cards, but terrible about greeting cards outside of Christmas/New Years.

    Do you send greeting cards?

  6. see my issue with writing thank you notes is i suck at writing. i can tell someone thank you and show them how much i appreciate a gift and tell them what i used it for but ask me to put that into writing and i clam up. i much prefer to just tell people thank you when they give me the gift. as far as with the boys, in order to teach them to appreciate gifts i make them go hug and thank each person as soon as they open their gift.

  7. I'm a huge fan of thank you cards. I passed out thank you cards a few days after my baby shower and I was surprised that quite a few women were shocked that I had been so quick to get them done or that I had done them at all.


    My mom raised me to always send a thank you note for everything and I don't plan on stopping that tradition any time soon.

    Now, birthday cards? Eek. I'm horrible at remembering to send those…sigh…

  8. I love a thank you note! I still send HAND WRITTEN thank you notes! Just a nice way to acknowledge that a gift has been received.

  9. I use to be really good then I had kids. They make it out the door but usually within a month. I am guilty of forgetting a time or two and then being too embarrassed to send them 3 months late.

  10. I was raised to write thank you's–always have written them and always will. Leo on the other hand…ugh! It kills me! It also gets on my nerves when I give gifts, mail them, etc and no thank you's arrive…

    BUT there was one time that I didn't write any…when I had severe morning sickness this winter. So, I called each and every one of the people that gave me and my family gifts 🙂

  11. AH! I HATE when people don't send thank yous.

    Case in point. We had to miss a wedding last year, so I ordered the gift through their registry. I have NO idea if they even ever received it.

    Why? Because they never even sent as much as an email letting us know.

    I am a stickler for correspondence. I still write notes just to say hello [email is so impersonal]. Thank you notes are a must.

    I find it easier to write the note immediately. That way nothing else gets in the way.

  12. I'm with you. It totally ticks me off if I send a gift and don't get a thank you. Especially if it's something like a wedding gift that I most likely ordered online. It's just common courtesy. And it ticks me off when people with kids don't send thank you cards, b/c they are just teaching their kids bad manners.

  13. I "usually" send them. I think I waited entirely too late after Christmas this year and ended up justifying it, because I never got a single one from anybody else! I like to send/receive them, because it lets me know a) that you got your gift, and b) whether or not you like it. My family never sent them, though. I'm not sure where I learned the habit. My grandmother, maybe?

  14. I ALWAYS write thank you notes…case in point…our wedding gifts..cant tell you how difficult it was to open gifts by myself and then write thank you cards from "us"…the girl that got married the weekend after me (goes to my chruch) didnt send out thank you cards…it burned me up. Only because I think people appreciate to know that you appreciate it. Not that I NEED a thank you card, but it really is nice.

  15. I was just talking about this with my sister today! We send thank you cards for things Maggie gets and I was the bride who sent out thank yous the week after our honeymoon. I send presents to my nephews and never hear a peep. I too don't expect them but it would be nice every once in awhile!

  16. I definitely agree with everything! My kids always send thank you cards, for anything!- even if I had to do all the writing, they added some coloring to it.

  17. right there with you on the thank you notes. actually i just like handwritten anything!! i love getting mail 🙂

  18. I agree completely. It really only takes two seconds, and it isn't that hard.

    Good for you raising good daughters! And keep holding out for the rest of your thank yous!

  19. I was raised the same way, and I'm the person who sends the cards the very next day. I too don't expect to be given a thank you card, but since it's the nice thing to do, it should be done!!!!! Way to go showing your girls the importance….they will THANK YOU for it one day!!

  20. Hmmm…you are right. I was taught to send them and only if they are personal, but it isn't always as fast as I would like. I think we all have strengths and timeliness on this isn't mine. I will say that kids have actually made me improve on this as I do want to teach them the correct way to do things…but for those people that aren't good at it. I give them grace as their may be a reason (I have friends that are dislexic (spelling?), etc) and we can't be great at everything.

  21. I totally write thank you cards all the time! For everything. Yes it doesent take that long and my sons will grow up writing them. I think everything deserves a shout out to the person!

  22. I'd agree with you. A thank you note is a nice gesture. My mom taught me to write thank yous. But so many people don't even think to do it.

  23. I was raised to send thank you cards for everything. Following one of my bridal showers, I wrote our cards while my husband drove us 5 hours home. I finished almost all of the cards in that time. After our wedding, cards were sent out within a month. We went to two weddings last summer and just got the thank you cards. One was a generic thank you – printed on a piece of paper that the couple had copied. They cut the paper in several pieces (saving paper, I guess) and sent everyone the same thank you!!

  24. I get pretty upset when I don't a thank you note. I have stopped giving gifts to some people because I don't receive any sort of Thank you…no verbal, no phone call, no text message, no email and definitely not a note in the mail. That doesn't really want me to keep giving people things!!

    After I got married I had ALL of my thank you cards out in less than a month….it doesn't take that long too do and a little goes a long way!!

  25. I've sent thank you notes for all of my graduation gifts and post surgery gifts.

    Birthday gifts come from my family so I just tell them in person. Some of my family would just throw them away, so I don't waste my time. If I even mention thank you cards they tell me not to bother. They much prefer phone calls.

  26. Peel and seal!! Now that kind of speed is talking my language! My mom taught me to write thank you notes, too. I’m better about it with some occasions than others!

  27. JANICE MURPHY says:

    Cute ides , I am glad to I am not the only one who still take the tine to write thank you cards , instead of sending them out on facebook, some one did that for a baby shower.

  28. I always make an effort and personally appreciate family and friends when the need arises. Thanks for sharing.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *