Why can’t we just baby wear and get along?
Disclaimer. I know. This sounds judgmental. I’m really not trying to be. I want people to open their eyes and think about what their words can really mean and do.
What the heck is happening to people? I’m starting to think humanity has lost it’s collective damn mind.
Just today, two baby carrier companies announced one is purchasing another.
Maybe it’s the optimist in me, but let’s just think this could be good for everybody involved.
But, nope, nope, nope.
I’m paraphrasing and combining people’s words here, but you get the gist:
“If I wanted cheap, I’d buy X-brand.”
“I hate X-brand. It’s a terrible carrier. I can’t believe this.”
“Bye X-brand. I wanted to buy small. You sold out.”
“I hope X-brand doesn’t suffer from this merge.”
“X-brand is elite. Y-brand is not.”
“You’ve betrayed your fans and customers.”
“Why not let one brand just fail?”
People. Okay, I’ll say it, women are being nasty! These are people’s companies you are talking about. Their livelihoods. Their second and third babies.
AND….AND the amount of judging (indirect or otherwise) that is happening because one person choses to use one carrier over another? It’s ridiculous! These moms and dads want what is best for them and their kids. And, maybe it does boil down to a budget, but they are doing their best.
So, telling people (yes, it’s basically being said) that they are using a cheap brand or non-quality brand IS a punch in the gut.
I can only imagine a mom reading that after finally settling her baby for the night. Heck, for the minute and she’s taking a break and hops of Facebook only to find that people are indirectly telling her that she doesn’t have what’s best for her baby. She’s made a poor choice. She’s neglecting her baby.
Maybe that’s not what you read. Maybe that’s not what you meant if you typed it. But think of that parent…maybe the one that has suffered through nights and days and weeks of postpartum depression or anxiety. Think of the mom that is second guessing every single mothering choice she’s made. And here in her face, she’s being told that she’s a failure.
Maybe this is all a stretch. Maybe I’m taking it to an extreme. But, I’m trying to look at this through another parent’s eyes (and even through my own) and I’m disgusted with what I’m reading.
Let’s change our thinking. Let’s slow down and think about our words. Let’s support each other and build each other up.
Let’s baby wear and get along. Or as the hashtag says #keepcalmandbabywearon
This is how society is these days, thanks to social media. So much good can come out of social media and so much negativity as well. People feel they can say whatever they want. They say things that they would NEVER say face to face. It is ridiculous. And what is concerning is that generations of kids are growing up like this. Ugh.
Disappointing. And concerning.
By the way, this post isn’t judgy. It’s common sense and truth.
Yes, social media definitely has some negatives. It removes people’s filters and time to think. It’s instantaneous! So concerning.
Thank you! I just worry I’m judging the judgers..or that’s the perception.
I love this. So true for SO many things with kiddos….we are trying so hard to do our best all day, every day with every single thing. Now please put into words how terrible ‘breast is best’ is. Yep, I said it. Terrible campaign.
I can’t even with the breast is best. I think I summed it up best in my post about all feeding is beautiful!
As someone who once sold/created a moderately popular brand carrier, I can tell you that it wasn’t a hard decision to leave the business. The new regulations became so cost prohibitive, that it was hard to stay in business. I have no doubt that’s part of what happened here, especially because both brands are so similar in design. The real losers in all of this are the consumers, because affordable options become harder and harder to find.
I can’t even imagine trying to keep up with all of the regulations and still run a business and make money.
I wish both of the brands success and income. And, I hope that it somehow helps with the cost prohibitiveness and more people that want carriers can get them.
I’m sorry to hear about you having to leave the business, too. I’m sure while you say it wasn’t hard, I imagine it was still a tough thing to do.
Say what now? I had no idea people could be so mean over this. But Judgey McJudgersons are everywhere, and man… some people need to stay in their own pools. I’ve owned two brands of carriers, and borrowed a few more. To each their own!
I so so miss my baby carrier days. I tried all the the soft structured at a local meeting when I was ready and the one that worked best for me and my body, the cheapest and lowest frill..which I made my own cover for flair! I still got a few people that questioned why I would have the cheapest one…cuz it worked people! There will truly be a special place in my heart forever for my Olives and Applesauce hybrid, that was one gorgeous and comfy carrier I used until my tall girl got too big. Sigh.
I feel like the judgement (in all mommy war issues) comes from a place of insecurity. You, as a parent, have to believe you made the right choice, because how could you live with yourself if you possibly made a wrong choice concerning your child? As a result, parents feel the need to defend their choices, further justifying to themselves that indeed it was the right choice. Unfortunately, this often is accomplished by bashing the alternate options to solidify in your own mind that you did indeed make the right choice. Whether it was the brand of carrier you bought for a high price, the decision to exclusively breastfeed, the decision to have three under three… Whatever choice you made, it HAS to be the right one because otherwise you’re a failure as a parent.
What people fail to realize is that MANY choices can be the right choice. They may not have been the right choice for your family, but they may be the perfect choices for another.
You have totally hit the nail on the head. It is all insecurity! 1000%.
There isn’t a right way for MOST parenting decisions and we can’t ever live in another person’s shoes.
Somehow, we have to get back to being strong, supportive women and build each other up. And, I have no idea how to do this!
I wish people would just live and let live. There is no need to drag a company for making a different decision than you would. There are real people and families harmed by the negativity. Great post, thanks for sharing.